Experience the wonder of words by focusing on the Latin and Greek elements used in English.
This newsletter is produced whenever time can be found,
so there is no regular schedule.
Senior Scribe, John Robertson
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The “Baffle-Gab Thesaurus” below can be used to create authentic bureaucratic jargon. As any self-respecting bureaucrat knows, it is bad form to use a single, simple-understandable word, or phrase, when obfuscating ones are more confusing.
Where can the Washington phrase maker go if he/she finds it difficult to think up an applicable phrase so no one can challenge an easy-to-comprehend title? Well, the combination of words shown in the chart below can be used to create common government phrases. It consists of a three-column list of 30 over-used but appropriately portentous words.
Whenever a government official needs an opaque phrase, he/she simply comes up with a three-digit number and selects the corresponding “buzz words” from the three columns. For example, 233 produces “Total Monitored Capability” which has the ring of absolute authority and means absolutely nothing. Perfect for governmeant jargon, don’t you agree?
| A | B | C | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Integrated | Management | Options |
| 2 | Total | Organizational | Flexibility |
| 3 | Systematized | Monitored | Capability |
| 4 | Parallel | Reciprocal | Mobility |
| 5 | Functional | Digital | Programming |
| 6 | Responsive | Logistical | Concept |
| 7 | Optional | Transitional | Time-Phase |
| 8 | Synchronized | Incremental | Projection |
| 9 | Compatible | Third-Generation | Hardware |
| 10 | Balanced | Policy | Contingency |
This “Baffle-Gab Guide” was popularized in Washington, D.C. by Philip Broughton, a U.S. Public Health Service official, who circulated it among civil servants and businessmen circa 1968.
Information about the guide was presented on September 13, 1968, by Time magazine, page 20.
Related to the jargon chart is this list of “Translating Politgabble” by a teacher named William Lambdin of Colorado:
Decentralizing the Government: Akin to dehorning a herd of stampeding bulls.
Fact-Finding Trip: A mission during which a candidate discovers the alcoholic content of drinks made in foreign countries.
Government Reform: a plan for tennis courts, swimming pools and rooftop restaurants in congressional office buildings.
In the National Interest: Used to express the preferences of Wall Street and Chase Manhattan Bank.
Lunatic Fringe: A geographic term designating the coastline of California.
Ship of State: An over-inflated rubber raft hurling out of control down a huge, economic drain.
Urban Renewal: Relocating the ghettos; for profit, of course.
Viable solutions: The used baptismal waters of officials in power.
War Against Inflation: A limited war, like that fought in Vietnam and Korea, which the government has no intention of winning.
Whirlwind Campaign: The important word in this phrase is wind.
Will of the People: An expression not heard when politicians talk of their own salaries.
Words
There are words that make us
Shudder, wince:
Wormwood, persimmon,
Alum, quince.
There are words that soothe
And tranquilize:
Slumbering, rainbows,
Butterflies.
There are words that tighten,
Words that roil:
Tension, turmoil,
Chaos, spoil.
There are words that shimmer,
That beguile:
Stars, ships, peacocks,
Firelight, smile.
And always, words
That make life full:
Love, laughter, home,
Peace, beautiful.
—E.B. de Vito
I have been doing a great deal of thinking about what I should be including in this newsletter, and I came to the conclusion that I should focus more on words so you, and others, can learn more about the great variety of vocabulary resources that are available for your verbal enrichment. Word Quizzes
At this time, I will be including a list of significant phobia and mania words for you to respond to and after you do, I will provide a self-scoring quiz which you can use to enhance your vocabulary skills.
Take a look at the following words and send me an e-mail with your answers. Please make sure you include both the numbers and your answers so I can tabulate all of the responses of this newsletter subscriber list.
Please do not look up the meanings of any of the words before you send me your responses. I would like to have your best guess if you don’t know what the word means.
Remember: The source of the self-scoring quiz about these words will be sent to you after you return your responses. Taking the quiz will help you understand these words.
1. The word acarophobia means: ___________
2. The word acrophobia means: ___________
3. The word adipomania means: ___________
4. The word agoraphobia means: ___________
5. The word aichmophobia means: ___________
6. The word amathophobia means: ___________
7. The word anopheliphobia means: ___________
8. The word apiphobia means: ___________
9. The word arachnephobia means: ___________
10. The word astrapophobia means: ___________
If you would like to purchase a copy of An Excess of Phobias and Manias book that lists and explains more than a thousand color illustrated phobias and manias, just click on the bar above for further information.
Latin-Greek-English Cross-Reference Search Sites
Latin-Greek-English Cross-Reference Search for contributing (paying) subscribers may be accessed from here.
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